Becoming a parent is one of the most exciting and challenging things anyone can undertake. It is full of heart melting and heart-breaking moments. From your child’s first steps to their graduation, parenting is truly a transformative experience. There are often many books and philosophies about parenting and many parents don’t know where to begin. Scheduling a well child visit with a pediatrician is a great place to start. Pediatricians see infants, children, and adolescents with all types of medical and behavioral concerns. Sometimes your child’s pediatrician will recommend more nuanced and in-depth support for your child’s behavior resulting in a referral to a behavior health provider.
Behavioral Health services consist of committed providers who support parents and families to find solutions to challenging behaviors your child may be experiencing. The long-term goal is to help children and parents maximize the quality of life they both want.
Many things in life require training and education like earning your driver’s license. Being a parent, however, does not involve specific requirements, and is one of the toughest things you can do. Thus, it is natural and normal for parents to reach out for support when they have questions or concerns. The CDC or Center for Disease Control is a useful resource for parents seeking advice. While it might seem odd to get parenting advice from a government agency that tries to prevent the spread of diseases, the CDC focuses on protecting the public’s health and safety with the use of boundaries and structure. It should be no surprise to find pages dedicated to the importance of having structure and setting boundaries for children on the CDC’s website.[i] Child protection is one of the most basic parenting instincts. Below are some tips and strategies that can guide your family to build structure and establish boundaries.
Safety First. The easiest place to start is to enforce rules and build structure with safety. For example, you establish a rule with your child that there is no running at the pool, no playing in the street, or only playing at a safe distance. These are examples of boundaries and structure you may implement that works for you and your child to help keep them safe.
Consistency is key. Children are more likely to be defiant if they are unsure about what is happening next throughout their day. A consistent and/or visual schedule may help your child feel safe and secure and avoid challenging behavior. Keeping your child on a consistent schedule will help reduce their anxiety about the next planned activity.
Getting plenty of rest. Do you feel cranky when you don’t have a good night’s rest? Your child feels the same way. Set boundaries for bedtime. For example, no screen time after dinner and then perhaps a bath and story time. Also, leaving plenty of time so your child can get the proper amount of sleep is important. Web MD reports infants need around 15 hours of sleep and even your preschooler needs a minimum of 10 hours of sleep per night.[i] That is a lot of sleep! Children grow and change so much, which is why sleep is paramount.
Routines Matter. Daily routines shape healthy habits by redirecting challenging behaviors and keeping children feeling relaxed and less anxious. For example, having a structural routine at night will help your child relax and make bedtime easier and thus make for a happier kid the following day. You may also have a routine in the morning after your child gets up that helps them have a good start to their day.
Discipline. Children may feel overwhelmed when demands are placed on them. Patience and consistency are key to disciplining. Inconsistency and lack of patience can lead to frustration and defiance from your child. The more your child practices and understands their routines and regulations, the better the outcome will be. Some parents will even have a structure in place for incentives that includes a sticker chart so kids can see how they are progressing toward their goals.
Stick Together. Having a dedicated support system improves outcomes for families resulting in less behavioral and emotional problems.[i] Working together improves the likelihood that parents and children will experience better mental health outcomes and overall family satisfaction.
If you would like to get started in your child’s early developmental journey, contact Lone Star Circle of Care at 887-800-5722 to schedule an appointment with a primary care provider, and see if a Lone Star Circle of Care Behavioral Health provider referral is recommended. We are here to help!
Blog post written by Jered Benedick, LCSW
Lone Star Circle of Care at Harker Heights
Resources:
Building blocks (2019) Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Available at: https://www.cdc.gov/parents/essentials/toddlersandpreschoolers/structure/building.html
How much sleep do I need? (no date b) WebMD. Available at: https://www.webmd.com/sleep-disorders/sleep-requirements
The benefits of shared and structured parenting (no date) Psychology Today. Available at: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/parenting-translator/202310/the-benefits-of-shared-and-structured-parenting